Dear blog reader, I hope this post finds you well...

 ...and what does this even mean?

Do you know how people usually start formal emails with: "I hope this email finds you well", or, "I hope you are well"? Well, what would happen if somebody actually replied with an honest, truthful answer about their feelings? Let's go a bit further and ask, what if we all started to reply honestly about how we are feeling all the time? What if we were honest?

The thing is, do we even know when we're being dishonest? Do we realize when we are not admitting the truth, even to ourselves?

Yes, I was dishonest in my life on many occasions. So were you, and that is quite normal. It has been made normal because the norm is what is the usual, and it is expected, right?

Recently I've found myself being radically honest with people in my life. I've been talking about things I've never dreamed of being so open about before. There are some topics in my life that, just a few months ago, would've been a no-no conversation for me, at least with most of the gents I know. Now, I don't really choose anymore. If you want to know, I will tell you. That is, if I feel like telling you. And I mostly do, as I previously mentioned. I start to find it hard to cover myself up under layers and layers of "this is expected of me". No, I am what I am, I'll do what I want, but I can't hide. And if you haven't just started singing with me, I must inform you that you are quite younger than me! Or much older! Or maybe just not that well acquainted with Dido and other great 90s music. Which brings me to another thing about me - I sing most of the time. I make lyric related puns. Give me a sentence, I'll give you a song! You may like it, you may hate it, but if you hate it - it sounds like a you problem :) 

I ask many questions, I whistle, I make funny little dances, I make great dad jokes. I am sometimes hyperactive, other times a bit down. I am as loyal as a golden retriever and equally as silly. I can be a bit too hard-headed, because I never stop trying. Two sides of a coin.

I try not to use "always" and "never". Sometimes I fail, like now. I am still learning how to stop and let go. I am still learning much about others. At the same time, that much more about myself. I have been wrong, many many times. I have learnt equally. I feel like, if I stop changing and evolving, I will die. At times, it can be too much. Other times, it is very wonderful indeed.

I love what I've learned in the silence. I love how much I thought I knew myself and how little I actually do. I love how much I still don't know. I love waking up every day knowing that I know nothing. I might be a bit under the influence of Krishnamurti (recommended read for all the philosophers out there), but you know nothing Daria nowadays brings a smile to my face.

Never stop exploring who you are, because you are not a copy.

...which reminded me of an old song as well, but luckily for you, I forgot the artist and the name of it.


Until some other lyrics hit me with an inspiration,

Stay original.

Daria

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